Give My Regards to Broadchurch

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PaulFair warning: this episode is going to bum you out, and I’m profoundly sorry for that. I wish more than anything that I wasn’t posting this; in fact, I thought for a long while about not posting it, and letting you all remain blissfully ignorant. But the consensus among people I love and respect is that you all deserve to be told, so I’m telling you.

Sigh.

Nootella?

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nutellaSee? We’re just like London buses: you wait for ages, and then two come along at once. This week, we discuss my m(o)ustache discoveries, and then (after a rude interruption) we talk about chocolate hazelnoot spread. Then, I lecture Johnson on a glaring disparity in the film The Great Escape, which leads us onto the subject of Dunkirk – something most Americans know nothing about (but soon will after it gets the Christopher Nolan treatment.) Link to the trailer here.

Battling Battery Bunnies

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batterybunniesAfter a little gap (let’s call it a hiatus) we’re back to talk about the curious case of two battery rabbits. Then we discuss dumplings in all their forms, and I relate the world’s first and only case of “clashtag.” Then we (eventually) get to some listener mail from, well, pretty much all of you.

Links (and lots of them): we’ve got the Duracell origin ad, the Energizer origin ad, the fox hunting one, the Sitagin one, Jeff’s excellent photo, and Kevin’s kickball video. Phew!

Treacle!

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LylesGoldenSyrupGroveling apologies for the gap between episodes, but that should make this one all the more sweet! Ha! Heh! Ahem. Anyway. This week, we discuss molasses, treacle, and the unfortunate slave-trade that brought us both. Later, Sam takes the quiz and tries to guess what a “sand dollar” is without being racist.

Oh: here’s Norman Collier doing that thing he did. Yeah.

Actually, There Are Lots Of Spoons

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SpoonBoyThis episode, we inadvertently enter the wacky realm of spoons, which aren’t just for drugs anymore. Then we hear some listener mail from Raphael, Chris Morris, Jochen and Jeff – everything from disappearing black people to Johnson’s accidental outing. Then, we learn about Cel-Ray Soda, which has the power to divide entire continents.

Mentioned: disappearing black people from the Star Wars and Couple’s Retreat posters.

Tilted Kilts, Alphabetti Spaghetti

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ARSEThis week we discuss “The Tilted Kilt,” a pub, eatery and affront to Celts everywhere. Then we ponder why time itself is pretending to be Irish, which gets us onto Will-o-the-Wisp. Then we chat about gobstoppers vs jawbreakers, and why Alphabetti Spaghetti (much to my chagrin) shouldn’t be called that, which leads to the story of a British manufacturer of Italian food telling its customers to avoid its products. Finally, some listener mail from John Killey about bears, both Teddy and Pooh.

Some links to things discussed: the Willo The Wisp cartoon, the wiki pasta shapes page, the BBC Dolmio article, the tombola quiz show, and Johnson’s Bluebird Facebook page.

How To Speak American

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30130563.c89b7054.240This week, we catch up on listener mail from Jeff, Beth, Jochen, John K and my dad; we learn everything from how foreigners decide which “English” they want to speak, to why British soldiers are called “Tommies.” Then, Cocker takes the quiz, and tries to figure out what “kickball,” “Jim Crow” and a “back forty” might be, while Johnson ponders “de-bagging,” “bluebottle” and (with horrible below-the-waist results) — “sling your hook.”.

Soda Sommeliers!

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TizerThis week, I make Johnson try various British sodas, and along the way we learn about e-numbers, tidy man and dwarf suicide. Then, we compare Captain Birdseye and the Gorton’s Fisherman to see who’s better at selling fish and shagging mums. Then we open some listener mail from Raphael, Carol, Lindsay, Gary and Jeff – most of whom nag me about posting shows more often. Tch!

Links: the tizer ad, the two Irn-Bru ads here and here, the two Bird’s Eye fish finger ads here and here, the two Gorton’s ads here and here, the Milton Keynes Pancake Day article, and the Dump Meals photo. Phew!

Quarterly Losses

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SurrenderQuarterThis week, we talk about the outrageous British Surrender Quarter, then make some startling discoveries about Teddy Bears. Then, I have a hankering for some Banoffee Pie, and we get listener comments about bumfluff and gyros. Finally, I educate Johnson on the firemen of Trumpton, along with Top Cat and Phil Silvers. Some links to things discussed: the Danny Baker Show, Lenny Henry’s condensed milk sandwich, and Mssrs Pugh, Pugh, McGrew etc. of Trumpton.

The People vs Open-Faced Sandwich

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SandwichMugshotThis week, we discuss the lie that is the open-faced sandwich, and hear about its scandalous legal troubles. Then, we imagine having entire theme parks named after us, and hear about familiar products that have different names elsewhere.

Some links to things we talk about: the Panera v Qdoba case, the British Oil of Ulay (yes, Ulay) commercial, the Night Nurse and Nyquil commercials, the Operation ads from both U.S. and U.K., and the great Marathon / Snickers re-brand.